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My Life as a Child

By Julie Richman

The Good Old Days

My experience growing up has been very different from that of my children or grandchildren. Was that time the Good Old Days? I don’t know. In retrospect, each era is its own good and bad times for those living in it. When I think of my life as a young person, it is hard for me to compare the differences and similarities between yesterday and today. The current recession has reminded me of that time, but only in the outward appearance of it.

My mother and father were immigrants who had left their native countries for good! They wanted to become Americans and desired to raise their American children according to the norm at that time the Great Depression of the l930's. Although life was difficult for my parents, they managed to put healthy food on the table and provide the basic necessities of life such as shelter and clothing. That was it. My brother and I spent our childhood making up games, playing with other kids in the neighborhood, and reading books from the public library. Neither of had many toys.

We had playing cards that provided plenty of stuff to do from card games to building houses out of cards. I had Jacks, checkers, Dominos, crayons and coloring books, and cut out dolls to play with. Playing "dress up" with mother's shoes and clothing was an activity that most of my girlfriends enjoyed.

We knew the rules of our lower middle class society. Be a good citizen. No stealing, no lying, (except very small lies regarding age when looking for a job) no cheating, volunteer to serve and help others, and be patriotic. We loved and respected our parents and were expected to be respectful of everyone, especially adults and people in authority such as school teachers, policemen, firemen, politicians, the government, and most of all, the American Flag and the President of the United States of America.

I would never think of being "fresh" to my parents or talking back to them, even if I disagreed with them. I knew what was expected of me as far as deportment within the family such as cleaning up after myself, hanging up my clothes, and helping with the household chores. Other than that, there weren't a lot of rules we had to obey. We were allowed to be independent. We had our secrets and didn't tell our parents a lot about what we were doing a lot of the time. Sometimes bad or possibly dangerous things happened, but we didn't tell our parents about these events, or maybe, anyone. We certainly had a lot of freedom to experience the world.

My parents were definitely not helicopter parents. They were totally uninvolved in our school work but they expected us to do well in school and bring home good grades. Neither of them ever asked if we had homework, or knew if we did it. During the summer when school was out, we could spend our days outside exploring our neighborhood. We only had to be home in time for dinner which was a rule we never disobeyed. Our family always sat down to a meal together. Although my mother worked, she cooked that meal from scratch. We never went to a restaurant for any meal, but once in a while, my brother and I bought hot dogs from a street vendor, or, if we couldn’t afford a hot do, got a hot tamale.

When we were teenagers, we were expected to find a part time job, even if we had to lie about our age in order to do so. My first job was at Woolworths when I was 13 years old. From that time on, I always had a job after school and on Saturdays. I worked as a dress sales girl, in a T shirt factory, a mailing house business, a typist (when I learned to type), in a deli, at a notions counter in a department store and as a very inefficient secretary.

I didn't ever think about going away to college when I was going to high school. My family couldn't afford it and I knew I needed to graduate and get a job. In fact, that is what they told me I had to do. Go to junior college for two years, graduate and get a job. I lived at home with my parents and I expected to work only as long as necessary until I met someone to marry.

Now

I have six grandchildren who either have graduated from college or are in college now. Their life experiences have been a little different from mine. For one thing, all of them are very used to eating at restaurants and have done so all of their lives. And not only at fast food restaurants. They all come from homes where everyone sits down to cooked meals together, similar to what I experienced growing up and what was true for my own
family.

All of them had toys and electronic devices as they grew up and they still do. Every grandchild had lots of homework, and for the most part, their parents made sure they did the work. They were not required to get jobs in high school, but several of them did find some way to earn extra money for personal expenses. All of them have gone to college and have had to take out loans in order to pay tuition. That means they are going to have quite a lot of debt to pay back when they are just starting out in careers.

Another important difference is that they are quite relaxed about rules of society and obeying authority. They make fun of politicians and have rather low opinions of many elected officials. Nevertheless, they support causes and believe this support will achieve results for society. They have high expectations for the future and are willing and anxious to achieve success in their lives. I have to say that my grandchildren are certainly a good model for this era, and I am proud of their parents for raising such great young people.

I am satisfied that they represent the future of society. So for now, the world is going to be all right.

Contributor's Note

I started this some time ago when parenting was the subject. I guess I am a little behind in my intel production capabilities.

Great story, Julie. It brings back some of my childhood days in the 40's and 50's in rural New Hampshire. Responsibility and respect for others was more important, then it seems to be today.
Thank you for the memories.
Frederick

Now I am visiting my family in Florida. I have to admit that my grandsons, who are intelligent and good students, don't feel obliged to be respectful of anyone. They are part of the "me generation." My hope is that they may change as they get older. Thanks for your comment. It is much appreciated.

Very nice story Julie. It must have been hard growing up with immigrant parents, especially in the depression years. I know my Mum and her family had tough times in England in the 1930's as well.

I spent the last 15 years in the USA, 12 in Indiana and the last 3 in South Florida, so I am looking forward to reading your Intel on Florida and Chicago as well - haven't got their yet.

Poddys Jan 6, 2010 14:45

I missed this one. (I blame Qondio, the networking features weren't introduced until December.) But thank you for this story. I still remember your other recollection and I think about it often, because I myself am often busy working and let the kids play by themselves.

It's awesome that you have a positive outlook for the future. Many people of your generation deplore the attitudes prevalent among the young, pine for the old days, and fear for the future. Your optimistic take is refreshing.

nick Jan 7, 2010 10:44

I enjoyed reading about your childhood. I agree with you about every generation having its own rewards and problems. The "good old days" weren't always so good. Some things have improved, but there are always social problems. Like you, we kids were allowed to roam all over the place as long as we were home before dark. We also weren't careful or wise, but never told our parents what we had done. It's a wonder I survived childhood (mid 1960s).

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